Sunday, September 9, 2007
I met Valerie when she called my group "The Ottawa Advocates for Psychiatric Patients" (OAPP)
Valerie and I became fast friends. Her father was a doctor in Montreal. Valerie was a nice woman.
Valerie was Jewish. I told her my first boyfriend was Jewish and that his name was Marvin H. and he was from Toronto.
I told her I was engaged to him but when he told me he had had one sexual encounter with a man in his past I dropped him like a ton of bricks. Marvin got suicidal because I broke off our engagement. I wanted to marry a man who was straight and not bisexual. I still loved Marvin but thought if I married him that he might turn to other men for pleasure and I did not want that. Marvin wanted me to move to Toronto and I said no. Marvin wanted the engagement ring back. It was an engagement ring he gave that was his ex's. I said no and sold it to a jeweller many years later for 20 dollars, I needed the money. The ring was beautiful. It had a diamond in the middle surrounded by many small diamonds. I think Marvin should have bought me a new rings and not his ex's.
Marvin was a good person and nice. I wished I could have married Marvin but I did not want that.
Marvin is a private math teacher in Toronto.
Valerie was a nice person. She liked men and had lots of boyfriend on the go. She was in her 30s, she was beautiful and men liked her too. She loved men. She had a pretty face and a nice body. She had a nice personality too. She was a bubbly type of person. We had fun when we got together. We laughed a lot. A man from Sweden was using her and I told her. Igmar kept her hanging on.
Dustin met Valerie in Ottawa on a nature walk. They clicked as friends right away. Dustin invited
Valerie over to his apartment. Valerie sat down on the couch and took out a condom and said to
Dustin "you're so cute and handsome, let's do it" and handed the condom to Dustin. Dustin took the condom and blew it up into a balloon. Valerie looked devastated but got Dustin's point. Dustin
wanted no part in having sex with Valerie. Dustin was too much of a gentleman to take advantage of Valerie. Dustin has class. Valerie and Dustin remained friends. Dustin took no offence to
Valerie advances towards him. Valerie told Dustin "Sue is pretty, why don't you go out with her"
One day I went to visit Valerie at her apartment on Somerset Street near Bank Street. She had a small bachelor apartment. On her kitchen table she had a box opened that had condoms. I asked her if she made all her men put on the condoms and she said sometimes she asked them to, others times she did not ask them to. I told her she knew AIDS and STDs were around and she should practice safe sex. I told her to tell her men "No glove, no love". I didn't want anything to happen to Valerie. I was like a big sister to her. She was not offended and she said I gave her good advice. I never judged Valerie about all her men. It was her life style, not mine.
I remember having a Chinese meal with her at a restaurant. It was a real experience. Valerie was very knowledgeable about everything. She was smart. She used to work as secretary at a Montreal University. We talked for hours. With Valerie you got lost in her conversation and you never released how much time had passed by. Valerie was very entertaining. Her sweet qualities and
her awareness about everything around her wanted you to stay longer with her and listen to her more.
She was capturing to say the least. I liked spending time with Valerie. You never forgot the time you spent with Valerie. Valerie was unique and one of a kind.
Valerie respected me. Valerie had a child like quality about her. She was very refreshing and bright. She was a joy to be around. She was kind and sweet. She had this tremendous laughter that was contagious. When Valerie laughed, everyone around her started to laugh. She looked at the world as if everything was new to her and she was seeing everything around her for the first time. Valerie loved life and she lived to the fullest extent of it. I admired Valerie at her zest for life. Valerie was always on the go, out and about you could say.
Valerie told her father that she wanted to go to Paris to find a man to fall in love with. Her father thought Valerie was losing it so to speak so he went to the court house in Ottawa and had his daughter committed into the local loony bin for 72 hours. Nothing was wrong with Valerie the doctors told her dad and they let her go after her 72 hours were up. Her father must have been a very controlling man.
If Valerie had gone to Paris she probably would have met a man and fell in love and then left him shortly after to return to Canada, all she probably wanted was a fling...
Valerie just wanted to travel and be romanced by the beautiful city of lights, Paris. I have had the same dream from time to time. I am sitting at a small cafe late at night and a handsome French man comes over to me and speaks to me in a Parisian accent and asks if he can sit down and I say yes. He buys me a glass of wine and that is the start of a very romantic evening. Valerie's idea about a trip to Paris was harmless and so were her dreams of getting a man in Paris.... who wouldn't want to visit this great city and fall in love....everyone has dreams and I believe this keeps up our spirit and passion alive...
Valerie left Ottawa and then moved back to Montreal. I miss Valerie. I miss her laughter, her honesty, and her carefree spirit.... Valerie was one of a kind...a special person....
Valerie was a woman who did what she wanted and didn't care what people thought about her...
I liked that quality about her...she was her own person and the world was her pallet to paint on...
Where ever you are Valerie, I wish you much joy and happiness...